From the edition of Tuesday 3 November, so slightly out of sequence. As always, spelling, punctuation, grammar and logic are exactly as printed in the Waikato Times.
Rumour has it that our Prime Minister had two flags in his possession for the World Cup final. One was some form of the ponga frond. And the other was an Australian flag with silver fern fronds embracing the large fifth star. Either way he was not set to be a winner. Either another extension of free trade. Or we become a new state of the commonwealth. The new symbol on rugby jerseys may be some form of Walliwi or Kiwallaru. We just have to take care not to break the embryo containing egg. But we are assured by Mr Key that he and Mr Turnbull are careful egg minders.